Revelation
Nimi Kurian
9 May 2009, 17:40“Sushma! Sushma!” he screamed out from the study.
She closed the book she was reading and got up.
“What is it now? Can’t you allow me a little time to read?”
“Read? Read? That’s all you want to do. Waste your time with all that nonsense and fill your head with stupid ideas. You are my wife and here to do work. You have to ensure that the house is kept clean. You have to…”
“But Vinay, the house is clean!”
“Don’t be silly look at that smudge on the window. And look at this – a spot of dust on the table. And this curtain, its not been pulled back correctly.”
Sushma knew better than to argue. She knew if she said anything he would only have more to say and point out more things that she had not done and then the accusations would get worse and worse ultimately dragging in her parents and even her grandparents!
“You don’t know how to supervise servants. You think they know what to do. You have to follow them around the house and ensure that they work well. You have to SUPERVISE.”
“This is rich coming from a man whose house was kept like a pig sty before he got married. Whose mother’s house is always a mess and she can never get maids to stay,” thought Sushma to herself.
She gave him a look of utter contempt and walked off. That angered him more, for he knew exactly what she thought of him and his ideas. He followed her out of the study shouting loudly. Sushma refused to react. She could feel her eyes smarting with the unshed tears but she refused to cry. She would not give him that pleasure.
“…from tomorrow I don’t want the servant to enter my study. You will have to clean it. Find out a time when I am not using the study and clean it. Make sure you dust the table and sweep under the cupboards.”
Sushma hated the marriage. She hated the man. She hated his overbearing attitude. She hated everything in his house. She wondered what it was in her that caused him to want to hurt her so much. She knew was a wreck. These eight years of marriage had ruined her. She hardly ate anything for if Vinay saw her eating he would say ‘nice to stuff your face when I have to earn the money’ or ‘expensive taste in food you have considering you don’t have to earn the money, nor did your father give me any money to keep you fed’. As time went by she stopped sitting at the dining table to eat with Vinay, saying she had to make the rotis while he ate – so he could have them nice and hot or some such excuse. Nights were tortuous trying to satisfy his sadistic demands, so she woke up tired.
Her hair was falling and her skin blotchy. She developed a rash on her hands that was itchy. Her physical appearance didn’t go unnoticed. Vinay was quick to notice and say nasty things.
‘Look at my sisters. How well they have kept themselves… ‘
‘What happened to your face?’
‘Try not to touch anything with those hands, it may be infectious.’
She wanted to hit out, to answer him to fight him. But most times she was tired. And she didn’t have the strength to stand up to him. He never let her go out of the house, and if ever she did step out he watched the clock and demanded a lenghty explanation of every minute spent and who she had met.
It was so long since she had met anyone or spoken to anyone that if anyone attempted to begin a conversation with her, her eyes would fill with tears and she would mumble and stutter.
She knew she was a mess. But there seemed to be nothing she could do about it, for she had no idea where this was all heading.
The next day on, whenever Vinay stepped out of the house, she rushed to the study and dusted and swept and mopped it. When he returned it was clean and sparkling. Immediately he would begin to mess it up. Throwing paper on the floor, though the bin was close at hand or pulling down books he did not need, and ‘accidently’ knocking down the empty tea cup so the dregs would spill onto the table. Sushma never said a word, well she never had the courage to say anything.
One morning, Vinay was in his study when his mother called.
Sushma knocked on the study door. “Your mother is on the line.”
Vinay answered the call, and shouting that he had to rush off was out of the house. Sushma thought this was a good enough chance to clean the study as Vinay was not in the house.
Carrying duster and broom, she marched into the room. It was hard to believe that the room was cleaned only yesterday. She began to tidy the table, picking up the books and arranging them on the shelves.
She saw a diary open on the table. She was just about to close it and put it away when a couple of lines caught her eyes.
She read them again. She could not believe her eyes. So this was what he was doing to her! She was shivering with fear and she read the lines once again: Break the victim physically, mentally and emotionally. Then step in as the saviour and put the yoke of servitude on her neck.
I have tears reading this.
— sridhar · May 12, 01:18 · #
A narration that touches and
Painful to read.
Well written.
— Jude · Jun 18, 01:29 · #